It took me about 12 years to tell my parents remotely what happened, and even then, I definitely downplayed it. When I put out my post on social media, that's when they learned the details of it. I feel most bad for my parents because they noticed a shift about 15 years ago when the abuse started. The light went out in their son's eyes one day, and it's never come back. They've watched me for the last four years trying to build my life back and trying to get some light back in my eyes. I told them not to watch today. They don't know all the details of this, but I'm sure they will see it at some point.
The ripple effect of abuse is not just on the person. It's on my coach. It's on my teammates. When I show up to a meet, I'm a pariah now, but that affects a lot of people. That affects my club. That affects my family. That affects my friends. It's a long-reaching issue for one case of abuse.