Yes, absolutely, and I think we need to address that more honestly sometimes, because when you're spat at every single day, although the love never goes away, the ability to keep standing in the midst of it is extremely difficult. When you feel as though you're failing a child, it's easy to give in to that feeling if you don't have support around you to tell you to keep going. That support is key.
I don't know if that was your experience, but there were days when I did feel like a failure, and I'm not ashamed to say that. This was a situation for which I was ill-equipped. I think that's the best word for it. Every step forward, as I said, you're beaten back. It's at a level that you don't comprehend until you're experiencing it. Knowing that other people have experienced it helps to keep you in the right place, but it is difficult to attach to a child who is unwilling to attach.