Good morning, everybody.
As Paula said, my name is Jessica Weatherbee. I'm a registered nurse.
My son's name is Vincent. He was our first child. He was born at 23 weeks gestation and passed shortly after birth in my husband's arms. Imagine this: You're a father and you've just experienced the loss of your child. Imagine what kind of emotional state you would be in while trying to be there emotionally for your partner, who is also physically ill from the complications that ultimately led to the death of your child.
This is what we went through. He worked for a cable company running lines in close proximity to high voltage, something that requires a sound mind and attention to detail. His employer gave him just over a week off work, which they considered generous at the time. As a note, this was my husband's vacation time for the year. Just seven days prior, he held our son as he took his last breaths, and somehow he was expected to go back to work. We didn't have a family doctor at the time, as many people don't, so we went to a primary health clinic in my hometown where no one knew about our loss. We couldn't go to a local ER as we would have been a non-urgent case and would have had to wait for hours and hours. Mentally we just couldn't handle that. We saw a physician and asked if my husband could be put off work. The doctor actually said to us that this was not a legitimate reason to be off work. He gave my husband a prescription for four tables of Ativan to help him sleep and sent us on our way.
In that week we had off, we had to fit in all the end-of-life arrangements and try to come up with money to pay for all of the unexpected expenses. I have a well-paying job. We were what I would consider financially stable; however, I wasn't anticipating any of this. No one financially prepares to bury their baby, nor do they prepare for all of the expenses that come with being off work on an unexpected early leave. Ultimately I was off work for nine weeks. I was entitled to 15 weeks. I returned for two reasons. First, I couldn't stand being alone in my house any longer since my husband wasn't home and we had no other children. The silence was not therapeutic. Second, mine was our primary income. My husband worked for a little over minimum wage. We have a house, a vehicle and other bills.
I filed for EI in the first two weeks after Vincent passed away. I never received a payment until my first day of returning to work on November 10, 2014. Vincent was born on September 4. I called several times to see what the holdup was but was mostly told to wait patiently.
I do believe, as a direct result of my husband's lack of time off after the passing of our son, he has developed depression.
Thank you.