Exactly. I coordinated 25 organizations on this, and, like you, I had to reach a consensus. The consensus was to “keep it simple, stupid”.
You still have the facility to rearrange this. There is a requirement that the spouse receiving the transfer would sign off. I would like to see her get financial advice when that happens. I would like her to take satisfaction in the fact that she's not getting this for any other reason than entitlement. I see it as an entitlement issue, so my suggestion is that we should make that point very clear.
I've been to many meetings and I have come from this angle--that there's an entitlement and that this is a women't privilege. In my own case, my wife put me through school. She was the one who, because she couldn't go anywhere, put her energy behind me. In those days they called it the woman behind the man--unfortunately, because she probably would have done better than I. She's here as a witness to this.
I agree with you. I don't know an easy way to do it, but I do subscribe to the idea that you should make it very clear that the reason this is put in place is for entitlement. She earned this.