I would like to talk about self-esteem. You referred to self-esteem twice but it never came up again in the conversation.
In terms of violence, it isn't always easy to rebuild as a person, whether it's a man or a woman. In each case, there are often fears and doubts that remain. You have to be able to trust the person you're with. But it isn't easy to trust another person again, to rebuild as a person or give yourself a new opportunity to start afresh in life.
In terms of my own experience, I can say that it wasn't easy for me to rebuild at a personal level, because I had trouble trusting people, even though I had resources. I have been living in an urban environment for a long time and I didn't really turn to my community for help to rebuild my life.
There isn't really any encouragement for people living the communities. That person will feel alone, because he or she has very little self-esteem. There is no encouragement, even for young people—and I can speak for young people. When they don't receive any encouragement, they don't look any further than what is there.
In the communities, they often say it takes an entire community to raise a child. My experience is that most parents don't provide any encouragement because they have alcohol and drug addiction problems.
As a result, a child grows up thinking that it's perfectly normal to use these substances. And violence reigns; the children don't know where to go and they don't know what a normal life really is. And there are also the children who are left on their own. They grow up faster. They see themselves as adults sooner, as was my case. At the age of 13, I was an adult because I had been left on my own. In the house, there was drinking going on and violence mixed in. The sexual abuse occurred in that context. And we still see that in today's reality.
So, it's not easy to rebuild on a personal level. I work on that on a daily basis. And today, I have the sense that I'm not sitting here for nothing. If I were still the person I was in the past, I would not be here today talking about the Aboriginal reality.
I agree with Anne when she says that the men also need to receive services. I agree with her when she suggests that there has to be psychological and mental support for the men, because this also comes from their own past. It isn't always easy to reach the male ego. They will tell you that everything is fine, that they feel better today, but you don't know what is behind all of that. I have often seen that happen. I wouldn't say they are egotistical, but their ego is not easy to reach. Getting them to talk about what they have been through is not easy either. Their past is a burden for them, a burden they have to carry. When I was young, I often saw my uncles hitting their father. They also fell into that whole dynamic. It has become a vicious cycle.
I agree with Anne when she says there have to be resources for the men. In any case, that is part of the reality.
We have been talking about young people and youth protection services. But it's the same thing today. What will happen to these young people if they are always being taken away from their families?
I am about to begin a social work program. It's not easy to be under youth protection services. It was a good thing for me, but it is not always easy. When children are placed in non-Aboriginal foster homes, they lose their culture. That is what happened with my children. I had to take them back there.