I know that 14-year old boys will say, “I can't change now. I've been this way all my life”, and it's funny, and when 30-year-olds say it in the group, the 50-year-olds laugh at them, and when the 50-year-olds say it in the group, the 70-year-olds laugh at them, because it's funny, no matter what.
When the men who get it, especially the older men who are trying to regain the relationship with their children whom they violated in different ways their whole lifetime together, see those young guys come through the door, one of the first things they say is, “I'm so happy you're here now, because if I had come when I was your age, my life would have been happy, my kids and I would have a relationship, and I would probably still be with their mother.”