Sure.
We were told that our dad was stressed and made a few mistakes, that our boundaries were incorrect, that we needed to be educated because we didn't understand relationship boundaries, and that our thinking was disordered and distorted. The therapist also asked us to look into our dad's eyes and tell him that we loved him, because telling our dad that we loved him would make things better.
Overall, we were blamed and repeatedly told we needed to change our behaviour and perspective in order to make things better. We were ignored and consistently asked about our mom's reaction to the abusive events. I didn't understand at the time, but I later realized that this was an attempt to further the accusations of alienation against my mom.
My sibling and I tried to refuse to attend therapy, but we were told we had to go. We each had one session per week with the therapist—alone, together or with our dad—for one and a half hours. On top of this, we would soon be doing activities every weekend with the therapist and our dad for four hours without our mom present, such as baking, shopping, cooking and going on outings. When we asked how long we had to do this for, there was no conclusion date provided.
After many sessions, my sibling and I refused to continue to attend. We thought that was the end of the nightmare. Instead, we started a section 30 custody assessment. The situation was even worse. The assessor spoke with the reunification therapist to get her opinion. My sibling and I again described numerous abusive episodes. My dad painted himself as the victim, and the assessor believed his numerous lies. We were not believed, not listened to and made to feel as though we were the problem. We were told we needed to get over the past and stop thinking about those events because they didn't actually happen. The assessor told me that I had black-and-white thinking, and that I needed to stop being stubborn and change my thinking. The assessor also said that I was overly emotional, that my emotions were distorting my memory, that I was defiant, immature and closed-minded, and that I was at a high risk of mental health issues if I did not have a relationship with my father.
I asked to have a lawyer represent us and directly express our wishes, but a judge would not allow it because we had an assessor involved in our case. We then had to start a second round of reunification therapy. This time, it was at an office over an hour away from our home and school. It was the same. We were told we were the problem.
The sessions with both therapists and the assessor were stressful and traumatic, against a background of the trauma I experienced with my dad for years beforehand. We then had to restart more sessions with the assessor because she wanted to assess how things with our dad were progressing in reunification therapy. Things were worse.
My dad's behaviour didn't change, and he was not held accountable by anyone throughout this process. Not one person in my life—