I'm Jesse Veltri. I served in PPCLI. My career started in September 2003 and ended May 25, 2012.
Upon my return from Task Force 1-08 in Afghanistan, I was one of the very first people in the battalion to realize I had an issue. Upon the rules and regulations implemented by the infantry and implemented by the Department of National Defence, I did what was the appropriate action. After I got into an altercation outside a local establishment, I started addressing my issues. I went and asked for help.
Upon my asking for help, I was really motivated to continue my career in the military. I have a police foundations diploma. I'm a college graduate, in 2003 graduating from Confederation College. I spent my whole entire infantry career trying to attain military police, because that was my goal. I have no criminal record as well as I have no military record.
On my return in 2009, I went to mental health and I asked for help. I was on no medical employment limitations, or MELs.
Upon my MELs, I was applying for what's called close personal protection, or CPP, which is an indication of a backdoor entrance to become a military police officer. After an eight-and-a-half-year career in the infantry, I was railroaded because I wanted to be a military police officer. It's like being a military police officer is bad in an infantry setting.
At any rate, to continue, I asked for help. Upon my asking for help, and having zero MELs, my platoon commander decided that ending my selection, the day I was leaving, was the appropriate action, and I quote: “Corporal Veltri, upon your attendance to Mental Health, you are no longer allowed to attend your Close Personal Protection Selection course.” It was about to start in 24 hours. My ticket was booked. If you look at the military records, you will see that I was approved for selection.
That was the downfall of my career, because right then and there, I had seven years of being railroaded—and my paperwork was lost in battalion. So I started to fight back. With the fight back, I started to realize that certain things were occurring. Opiate-based medications were given to soldiers on an everyday basis. When I decided to stop taking these medications and started finding alternatives, I was automatically red-flagged as being an issue and a concern. If you look at the Shilo records, I was probably one of the very first people released on the medical illness of mental disorder.
So I started to fight back. I started finding alternative programs to get me off these drugs. And I mean drugs; I mean opiate-based medications. I had drawers and drawers of drugs I didn't even realize existed.
Upon all this, I have nothing. My career's gone—everything I worked for. Once again, I'd never been in trouble. I started to fight back. I fought back so much that I lost it. In August 2012 I attempted to take my life. I woke up two days later on my bathroom floor. I couldn't tell anybody, because you know what? Nobody cared. I was pushed out. I was an outcast. I had nobody helping me. There was nobody around me. I was alone.
I got up off my floor that day and said I've had enough: I'm not going to put up with this anymore. I got up and I started to fight back.
Every day I get up and it's the same thing. It's a constant fight with you guys for just a standard. You guys have to implement one. You guys don't have any. You sit in these committees, and you talk amongst yourselves, and you think life is all grand. But for guys like us, it's fucking hard. Every day it's a struggle. I wake up and wonder what to do with my life. I wake up and go get in fights.
Do you know what that feels like? I have the biggest guys beat the shit out of me, day in, day out, just for some form of normality. It's not normal. What am I going to do with my life? Do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to sit here and I'm going to fight, because guys like you sit there, and you listen to these stories, and then you get to go home to your family and friends.
I know these systems don't work. Do you know why? Because I claimed PTSD and the legal system took away all my rights of being a father. I know that in everything I do, even if I follow all the rules and regulations, I'll still get screwed.
Do you know why? It's because I went into mental health and I asked for help. I should never, to this day, have walked into that building. I should have just sucked the fuck up like the infantry told me to do and do it, but guess what, I didn't. I didn't. I did the right thing—at least I thought it was. You guys are persecuting me because of it. You are telling me service dogs don't work. You guys won't approve them. You are right. Yet, there are still military members who have full-claim service animals in the military and they get jobs out of this. Day in and day out, these guys have jobs. I have watched guys sail on medical employment limitations in the military for 10 or 15 years, with jobs. How is this appropriate? Do you know what I mean? You guys need standards, just as we need standards.
I am going to quit right here. Once again, my whole statement here is that you guys have no standards with the Department of National Defence, which means your rules and regulations have to apply to them. You guys need to look at them, and your rules and regulations will fall into place, making your job easier.