Mr. Speaker, the horse race for the most outrageous action of the Liberal government has begun, and they are off.
The first one to the gate is the finance minister stumbling rather badly while carrying the extra load of high taxes, user fees and several tons of debt. Coming up on the inside is the Minister of Public Works, trying to convince the world that the cost of repairs to the House of Commons should not be included in the cost of repairs to House of Commons.
The Minister of Justice seems content to ride backwards on a beautiful Senate reform thoroughbred named Alberta while the Prime Minister is hampered by his tendency to pepper spray everyone else in the race.
As they reach the final turn it is the Prime Minister out in front, running now with his own foot in his mouth while trying to castigate his chief of staff for getting him into the race to begin with. The Minister of Public Works has wandered into the infield, disqualified for firing a bureaucrat who pointed out the difference between cost accounting and the minister's colouring book, while the Minister of Justice is whipping Alberta and calling her a joke, which means Alberta will get even with her later.
As they come to the wire, the finance minister is making a valiant effort but he is held back by extra EI premiums that are forcing him to use the whip on workers and businesses.
But, great scott, coming out of nowhere is the solicitor general whispering loudly to everyone in sight while pretending to be invisible. The other participants are falling away. They are in awe of his ability to remember, forget, deny and confirm, all at virtually the same time. The winner, hands down, is the solicitor general and the loser is the Canadian people.