Mr. Speaker, it was not my intention to speak to the particular bill, but having listened to the debate and having heard the sponsor from Hillsborough indicate his reasons for raising it my little old mind was just turning.
Everyone can imagine that as a young man I was actually a miniature of what I am today, but I had the same general geography and the same shape. As a result I have to confess that I was the object of a great deal of teasing. We would call it verbal abuse nowadays. In fact when I look back at it I realize I was really hard done by. I did not realize it at the time, but when I look back at it now I am amazed at how cruel some of the kids were to me.
I remember when our little country school closed down. I first attended a little country school with one schoolroom and one teacher from grades 1 to 8. It was closed down because there were not enough students. I was a big farm kid. I was about 180 pounds when I was in grade 8, so everyone can imagine.
We were bused into the big city school. Those city kids were merciless, not only because we were poor farmers but also because I had this, I thought, exceptionally fine aerodynamic shape. They did not think of it that way.
I had all sorts of things happen to me. I will not go into all the details, but just listening to the debate reminded me of some things I have long forgiven and forgotten. I have moved on with my life.
One thing that helped me to do that was parents who both by example and by encouragement helped me not to be discouraged. They helped to build my self-esteem which was greatly destroyed by not only the students, I may say, but also by the teacher.
I remember when I was in grade 9. I was ignorant, I will admit now. The young people here can hardly imagine it, but it was at a time before there was any television. I had never been to a football game in my life and because television had not yet been invented I did not know what football was.
As I say, I was moved into the city school. It was a beautiful fall day and the gym teacher said that we would play football. I did not have a clue. I totally did not. Nobody gave any instruction. We were just to play football.
I guess the other youngsters in that grade 9 class realized that I was ignorant, so nobody bothered to cover me because I was no threat. Lo and behold I later learned when the quarterback threw the ball to me. I was smart enough to catch it and I ran. As everyone can imagine that would have been quite a sight. I ran for all I was worth and I made a touchdown, but it was at the wrong end of the field. I did not know that I was running the wrong way. I thought these guys yelling at me were cheering me on to run faster. It was really quite embarrassing in retrospect.
However I still remember the teacher. I will not mention his name even though I guess I could within the confines of the House use his name. I still remember it. He came up to me and kicked me, and he kicked me hard. It hurt my tailbone. I was humiliated and hurt, but in my usual way I used humour and laughed it off.
I am sure I am the only one who remembers that incident these many years later, but that was a form of abuse. I guess nowadays I would sue the guy. No, I would not do it, but it is the type of thing which can be devastating. Fortunately I was blessed to have parents that gave a complete antidote to the results that type of thing could have had.
I remember another incident where these kids would deliberately take a step toward me. One of them would come up real close to me and then take a step toward me. What is the natural reaction? It is to step back because he is getting too close. Unknown to me another one had knelt down behind me and with that I went flying over and they laughed. They thought that was funny. I guess it was. It must have looked hilarious. I wish I had a videotape of it now, but it was abuse of the worst kind.
As I said, the greatest antidote to the results of verbal abuse came from my parents. On one occasion I did something stupid on the farm. I will not bore members with the details but I broke a piece of farm equipment strictly out of not being careful. My father would have had every reason in the world to bawl me out because we took the machine out of use for a while and it was costly to repair it. Instead my dad said to me “Ken, next time you should take a little more time”.
I remember the event vividly. My father, and I love him dearly, turned 90 a couple of months ago. He had no anger. He did not abuse me verbally or in any other way. He just gave me the solid advice that I should take a little more time, which is very good advice. The way he handled it put the onus totally on me. Had he struck out or lashed out at me with his tongue we would have had a good old battle and it would have been as much his fight as mine, but he handled it so well. I do not know where he got that wisdom but he did.
My hon. colleague from Hillsborough came up with the idea of bringing the nation's attention to the problem of abuse, be it verbal or other abuse. It is a notable and worthy goal.
As members know, I had the advantage of having taught high school for four years. I then taught at the college level for some 27 years before I came to this place. The difference between this place and the colleges is that here no one listens and no one learns. I should not say that. It is somewhat different from that. However during my years of teaching having gone through my earlier experiences helped me relate to young people who for one reason or another were also the object of scorn and abuse.
The initiative is a good one. It would help draw attention to the issue. The circle of abuse which goes from generation to generation must somehow be stopped. If we can draw attention to it and bring people to the point where they realize how hurtful words can be, I would hope that over a period of time people would learn to deeply respect one another.
I cannot help but think of another event that happened a little over a year ago which hurt me probably as much. I will say this as gently as I can. During the election campaign some of the comments made about our party by our political adversaries were very hurtful.
I am proud of the fact that my children have worked with relief agencies around the world. One of my most precious pictures is of my son and his wife as a newly married couple in Rwanda surrounded by some 400 beautiful little black children whose parents were killed in the country's horrible holocaust. Then someone has the insensitivity to accuse me of being a racist. That hurts. It is adult abuse. It is verbal abuse at an adult level and it sets a bad example to the children and young people of our country when it comes from our own leaders.
I wish we could get beyond that. I wish we could deal honestly and openly without false accusations or abusing each other verbally or in other ways. Let us build a society on respect and real love for one another where the interests and well-being of other people take precedence over our own.