I can give you quite a striking example. When I was looking for people to tell me about their experiences, I met a parent whom I didn't know who said that it made no sense and they had to talk about it. It was a single parent of two children, one of whom needed a lot of attention. That parent was incredibly afraid. I say “that parent” for a reason, because they passed their fear on to me. I can't say whether it was a mother or a father, because I am too afraid of identifying them. I respect their anonymity. That parent might however be representative of a lot of parents in the same situation.
That parent has responders and police officers in their family. No one in their family or circle knows they use drugs and take 8 to 10 amphetamine tablets every day to be a good parent. But that person can't manage, isn't able, doesn't have the energy, and cannot do it under the incredible social pressure to be the best parent possible, pressure that you must be familiar with as well. That person who takes 8 to 10 amphetamine tablets every day does not seek help. That person told me that if their children were taken away, that would be the end for them. So they have an incredible fear of seeking help and are afraid to talk. I could hear the person's voice trembling when they spoke to me, a person who deprives themselves of all kinds of services out of fear.
There is also stigmatization, which is even worse than self-stigmatization. People eventually internalize those messages. I am thinking of another person who was very involved in the community, a responder who had helped many people, but whose life had changed dramatically. Now that person is injecting drugs and has been treated as human garbage on the street. They had helped the community so much, but internalized those messages: When doors are opened for them and they are invited in, they answer that they don't deserve it.
There was also another person who asked for help at a certain point. In my study, I say that there is no wrong door to knock on to ask for help. That person knew about a rehabilitation centre, but did not know about the red tape involved. One evening when they were using, they decided they couldn't go on and had to stop because it made no sense. So they went to the centre because they had friends who had gone there. They were turned away and told they would have to go through the usual process and go to the local community services centre. This person didn't criticize the system. They said instead that they didn't even deserve to be helped by an addictions organization and were worthless. Then they went and used drugs. That's an example of the internalization of stigmatization messages.