It takes so much time. The medical conditions I have make it difficult for me to focus. They make it difficult for me to keep my things organized with different doctors' notes, appointments, records, receipts and everything like that.
It's also incredibly difficult to have to say again and again that I have been injured in this way. I mean, with every single application that I fill out I have to say that I was sexually assaulted in 2011. This is how it happened. This is what happened after. This is why I have PTSD, and now I have this.
I link it to the medications I took for PTSD or just the mental stress that came out and presented in my body. I have to do it again and again and again. That is what I mean about it being exhausting and dehumanizing. It is embarrassing.
Like I said, I'm ashamed I left. I advocate alongside women who went through what I went through, and they stayed in, but I didn't. I knew that, without knowing who raped me, I could never be safe in a room.
I shouldn't have to write on every form what my primary diagnosis was and all of the details to make it obvious. It's like I'm trying to dumb things down enough so that they can understand and make the connection. I'm exhausted from it. Like I said, there are claims I haven't put in that I need to. I need to, because I need care. I need coverage and treatment.
I will stop there. I'm sorry; I'm taking too much time.